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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 17:13:09 GMT -5
She felt the same. He didn't know if he should be happy or upset about this. If she felt the same then it also meant that she didn't want to feel that way either. Friends weren't supposed to love friends as anymore than just that. Chris had already made that mistake. He glanced up at the window he had spent watching her through every night and then back at her, dropping his hand back to his side to give her that space that he knew she wanted. "I'm sorry.." He repeated out of habit.
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 17:26:09 GMT -5
Reese took a small step and closed the remaining space between the both of them. She brought her hands up to his hair, sliding her fingers through his raven dark hair. “You know what Chris….” she softly, while her eyes looked into his for a brief moment before they looked down to his lips. Leaning into him she pressed a third kiss to his lips. A tear left her eyes and slipped down her cheek, falling on his. “I’m not…” she wasn’t sorry for the way she felt. She knew she couldn’t deny what she felt inside but she couldn’t keep herself from being afraid either.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 17:33:26 GMT -5
Reese closed the distance between them and once again Christian's entire body froze, his eyes glazing over in pure lust as fingers slid through his raven hair. She was making this difficult for him, too difficult to be able to walk away from this and try to forget in a few days time. Her lips touched his and it was awhile before he remembered just how to breathe. Kissing her back in the same fashion as he had before, placing a tentative hand on her hip.
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 17:47:15 GMT -5
What was going to happen next she didn’t know although Reese did prepare herself to the chance that he would push her away again. If he did, than she would let him. She would back away and never kiss him like that again. Course hoping all of that wouldn’t happen. Just as she felt her heart beat grow fast with the fear that he would push her away she felt him kiss her back. His hand slipping over her hip.
Without even knowing that she was doing it her hands gripped his hair tighter, trying to hold on to him as if he could run away from her any second. There wasn’t anyone she had been this close with after Jake had died. Chris was the first one she kissed since that dark day in her past, the first one she felt comfortable with while being this close.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 17:56:41 GMT -5
Christian didn't so much as grimace as she tightened her grip on his hair. Not wanting to show any signs of the pain he was currently going through. Actually once he thought about it, the pain had completely disappeared the moment she kissed him leaving him weak in the knees. What man he was. "You deserve better Mack.." He whispered against her lips, his own grip tightening on her hip almost to the bruising point. He didn't want to let go.
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 18:06:46 GMT -5
Her lips parted some when a soft gasp for air left her mouth when the grip on her hip got tighter. Had Christian any idea what he was doing to her? That he, besides holding her tightly, also made her heart beat faster, made her not wanting to let go of him, made her feel safe, feel wanted? “So do you Chris…” she replied softly, but kept just as close to him a she had been a moment before. Reese knew she wasn’t a great catch with her being a single mom at seventeen along with everything she had been going through in her past.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 18:16:09 GMT -5
If Reese thought that being a single mom would repel him from her then she was crazy. He was also a single parent. Chris could remember the day quite clearly in his mind that they both told each other that they were expecting a child. The memory brought a faint smile to his lips. He broke the kiss, but didn't make a move to step away from their tight little embrace. "I'm no Jake.." He replied, shaking his head in disbelief. Chris wasn't that deserving, he had flaws. Big flaws.
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 18:25:54 GMT -5
It wasn’t just being a single mom but she knew she came with a lot of extra ‘baggage’ besides her little boy. Her life was complicated, probably way more complicated than that of girls of her age. Reese opened her eyes, releasing the tight grip she had on his hair but kept strands of it twirling around her fingers. “I don’t want you to be….” Jake was gone. Reese knew that and she also knew there wasn’t anyone who would be able to replace him. There wasn’t anyone like her Jake. “You’re not his replacement…” she wouldn’t do that to him. Especially not to him.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 18:42:12 GMT -5
Christian knew that he would never be considered as a replacement, but he also knew that he couldn't be compared to Jake. The man who got her first. Though the romantic feelings towards her didn't come until after his death. He was confused as to where they stood now. Chris wasn't boyfriend material, that was for sure. He had never had the experience and as far as he knew he was gay. Or maybe she was the one exception to that? "Then what am I?"
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 19:06:06 GMT -5
Reese didn’t know if she was ready for a new relationship. If she felt true love for Christian. If she wanted a relationship to begin with. Or if she wanted to be in a relationship with Christian. Everything that was racing through her body was confusing, that was the only thing she knew for sure. “You’re my Christian.” She didn’t know what that meant or what he would want it to mean. He was her Christian. He just was.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 19:18:15 GMT -5
"Oh.." he mumbled. Once again Christian became suddenly interested in his shoe laces, trying to hide whatever emotion there was shining in his hazel eyes. He had known even before she said it that it was going to be her answer, and yet he was still unclear as to what that meant exactly. He didn't know what he had been hoping for to make him feel so disappointed.
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 19:33:48 GMT -5
He didn’t like her answer. Reese knew Christian for years now and it had taught her how to read him. To see when he was hurt, when he was trying to hide something, when something was up even though he pretended to be just fine. “I want you to make my wish come true. I want you to be my Christian and no one else’s.”
Even if she didn’t know if she was ready to dive into a relationship again, even if that thought of actually being with someone scared her, she didn’t want to be a scared little girl sitting on the sideline watching life pass her either. Reese knew you had to let go of the past at some point even though that was hard. She didn’t know if she was ready for that yet but she wanted to try. And the only person right now who made her want to try was Chris.
And that meant a lot.
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 19:49:07 GMT -5
Christian didn't understand what she was saying and it showed clearly on his face. He was still too wrapped around her last statement, the feeling of rejection, to really be able to think clearly. For a second time tonight he forgot how to breathe, this time being for a very different reason. Reese was toying with him, with the emotions he had kept bottled up inside for so long. His head began to spin and his vision blurred from the lack of oxygen in his lungs. He reached out to grab her shoulder for support but instead reached for her double, nearly falling onto his face. He had never suffered from such a severe panic attack before. "Why don't you just say no and be done with it?"
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Post by Reese Mackenzie on May 5, 2008 20:07:18 GMT -5
Reese knew she wasn’t entirely clear with her words. She might should have said things differently, seeing the confusing growing on Christian’s face. But had she been that vague? “Chris?” she started, becoming slightly worried when she noticed he wasn’t responding to her. And the way his face was turning pale wasn’t a good sign either. “Are you okay?” although that question had not been necessary when he almost landed flat on his face a few seconds later.
Quickly wrapping her arms around his waist, Reese made sure that his face was spared from meeting the ground. Supporting him the best way she could –considering she was smaller than he was, being a petite girl- Reese managed to keep him standing on his feet one way or another. “Can’t I say yes instead?”
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Post by Christian Tait on May 5, 2008 20:16:25 GMT -5
Christian didn't know how such a small girl could be able to catch him before he fell, but Reese managed to do it. Although there weren't any point in her efforts seeing as he could stand on his own two feet, with or without her help. He fell again, this time taking her with him. Landing in a tangled mess of arms and legs on the hard ground. "Yes what?" He gasped. For some reason nothing she said was able to be processed in his head.
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